


Tomodachi

by antimiya88



Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-14
Updated: 2016-10-14
Packaged: 2018-10-15 10:59:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 14,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10555184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antimiya88/pseuds/antimiya88
Summary: Nino met Ohno Satoshi twelve years ago when the latter transferred to his class. From the moment he met him he felt that they shared a similar aura. Little by little, they came closer. Before he knew it, Nino had already fallen in love with him. There was only one problem... Ohno Satoshi was his best friend...





	1. Chapter 1

Title: Tomodachi (One-Shot)

Author: Andy-chan ([](http://antimiya88.livejournal.com/profile)[ **antimiya88**](http://antimiya88.livejournal.com/) )

Pairings: Ohmiya (main & one-sided?), Sakumiya (side), Ohno x Ishihara Satomi, Aiba x OC, Jun x OC

Genre: romance, angst, slice of life

Rating: R

Summary: Nino met Ohno Satoshi twelve years ago when the latter transferred to his class. From the moment he met him he felt that they shared a similar aura. Little by little, they came closer. Before he knew it, Nino had already fallen in love with him. There was only one problem... Ohno Satoshi was his best friend...

Disclaimer: Kazu belongs to his Oh-chan and Oh-chan belongs to his Kazu

 

 

A.N. This is a long (~14.000 words) OS that I wrote for my dearest [](http://dani-mathoz.livejournal.com/profile)[**dani_mathoz**](http://dani-mathoz.livejournal.com/)! ^_^ It's based on Utada Hikaru's "Tomodachi".

 

 

  


 

 

 

Tomodachi

 

 

“Hey you!”

“You’ll never change…” Satoshi said muffling a laugh as he felt the small hands of his best friend touching his lower back. It wasn’t that he minded it… it had become like a ritual between them. Nino was the playful type who certainly enjoyed _skinship_ , as he was calling it; if all those idols were doing it publicly, why couldn’t he?! At first, Satoshi admitted he found the whole thing awkward; he wasn’t used to have his butt being groped on a daily basis but as the time passed by and got to know the other better, he realized it was Nino’s personal way of showing his love towards his friends.

“Of course I won’t! But that’s what makes me Nino, right?” he saw the other shrugging. “Besides… You know how much I love your cute little butt!” Nino added in a mischievous tone and winked at his friend before taking his hand into his and dragging him into the café. “Now, hurry up! Because of you I haven’t drunk my morning coffee and my body asks for its caffeine dose!”

Satoshi could only shake his head amused. Yes… That was what made Nino _._

They entered the café in which they frequented since their college years. It was small but cozy and the coffee was delicious.

“So… what was this so urgent thing that you wanted to discuss with me?” Nino asked in his usual excited tone after he sipped some of his coffee.

Satoshi lowered his head shyly. “Actually… I… want to ask you…”

“Out?” the other cut him off seeming to enjoy the startled gaze he met on his friend’s face. “I’m just kidding!” he made the widest smile he could at the moment before taking a deep breath. “But seriously now… it’s not my fault! You look like a high school girl asking her favorite senpai on a date! Why are you this nervous?”

Satoshi smiled. Nino would always be like that; lightening up the atmosphere… making him feel at ease when he wasn’t. He wasn’t an open person but somehow Nino was able to see through him from the very beginning. He never said anything unnecessary; never pulled things more than Satoshi was keen on sharing and that was what made the latter take the place of his best friend. He knew that Nino cared for him with all his heart despite his teasing, sometimes, behavior. He knew that it was nothing more than a cover to a deeply sensitive person.

“It concerns Satomi-chan…” Nino’s playful smile slowly disappeared causing Satoshi to sigh. “Nino…”

“What?! I didn’t say anything…” Nino mumbled pouting and drank some more of his coffee.

Satoshi knew Nino had never appreciated Satomi much. Despite his reassurances, Satoshi could tell… He had tried to find out why but the other would always deny his claims. “I know that you’re not her biggest fan-”

“I never said that!” Nino cut his words off. “Why do you insist that I don’t like her?”

“Because you frown whenever her name is mentioned?!” Satoshi replied making this time Nino hush.

Nino was staring at his friend for a couple of seconds without saying a single word. He knew Satoshi could read him; perhaps not as much as he did, but he certainly could. “It’s just that…” Nino started saying but seemed to hesitate. He was biting his lower lip looking almost guiltily. It was as if he was trying to find the proper words to continue. “Well… You know me, Oh-chan…” he whined at the end, finding his mischievous smirk back. “I like you too much to have to share you with her…”

“You sound like a jealous girlfriend!” Satoshi said while trying to hold his laughs back.

Nino smirked wider, leaning closer to the other. “What if I am?!”

“Nino! I’m speaking seriously here! Stop turning everything into a joke!”

_Joke…_ Nino closed his eyes tightly. If the other knew how much pain this particular word was causing to him… He knew Satoshi would never want to hurt him… not on purpose yet he did and that made Nino feel guilty because it wasn’t Satoshi’s fault… It was entirely his… He took a deep breath and cleared his throat. The last thing he wanted was the other to realize. “Sorry! I promise I’ll be serious from now on!”

“Has something happened between you two?” Satoshi insisted.

Nino sighed defeated. “I _really_ have nothing against her, Satoshi…” this time his voice sounding nothing like his usual ‘playful’ one.

Satoshi frowned. It was unusual for Nino to call him by his first name; he would usually call him Oh-chan or Oji-chan… and his voice… Why suddenly sounded so… surrendered… empty…?

“Nino…”

“Only a blind wouldn’t see how much she loves you… her eyes are getting brighter when she casts them on you… and the same thing happens with you… She loves you as much as you love her…” Nino spoke again.

“You mean it?” Satoshi sounded moved by his friend’s words and the only thing that Nino could do was smile; even if he had to fake it.

“Of course I mean it! I might like to tease you but I’d never lie to you… you know that! You are a great couple!”

Satoshi smiled widely, immediately his face brighten up. “You don’t know how much your opinion means to me…”

“We are best friends, aren’t we?” Nino said tilting his head, his eyes roaming on Satoshi’s face; taking a close look at every detail. He always looked cute but even more like that… he was happy and Nino was happy for him even if it meant that he would be miserable because he wasn’t the reason for this happiness. “So…” he cleared his throat. “What is it? What do you want to ask me?”

“I made a decision…” Satoshi spoke in a low voice lowering his gaze.

Nino’s heart clenched. He already had an idea… He tried to keep his smile but was sure he was failing. “You will ask her to marry you…” his voice came out trembling, almost like a whisper.

Satoshi nodded, a shy smile appearing on his lips. “Yes… I think I’ll do it tonight… It’s our fourth anniversary!” his voice turned softer. “I have already bought the ring…”

“Who could have thought that the day the ultimate dreamer Ohno Satoshi would take the decision to settle down would finally come?!” Nino said and whistled his usual way before resting both his elbows on the table looking directly at his friend. “You have everything planned… what is it that you want from me?”

Satoshi only smiled shyly. “Nino… you’re my best friend for more than twelve years now…” Nino chose to say nothing. “You’re one of the most precious people in my life…” still silence. “You were the only one who stayed by my side not only during the happy moments but also the sad ones…” he looked up finding Nino staring back at him with surprisingly unreadable eyes. “I want you to be by my side at one of the most important days of my life, Nino. I want you to be my best man”

Satoshi expected mocking comments, a playful pinch on his cheek… something… but to his surprise, Nino remained at his seat, staring blankly at the empty cup in front of him.

“Nino…?”

“Wow…” the other said after a while averting his eyes as if Satoshi’s presence was disturbing him.

“Nino?” Satoshi repeated, this time sounding concerned… worried.

“I… I would-” the words stuck on Nino’s mouth. This was too much. He looked up at Satoshi. He was sure that his eyes were glittering due to the tears that were threatening to start falling down his face. “It’s an honor and I would love to…” Satoshi’s lips curved into a smile making Nino hating himself even more but this was above his strength. “…but I can’t…” At the hearing of the last words he saw Satoshi’s smile fade away, his eyes asking him why. Nino couldn’t handle it anymore. Abruptly he stood up and without saying anything else he left the café almost running.

Satoshi was lost. What could have happened? He pulled a banknote out of his wallet and threw it on the table before following the other as fast as his legs could carry him. After a couple of meters he managed to grab Nino’s arm and turned him around, gasping at the view. Nino was crying…

“Nino…? Why are you crying? Has anything happened? Tell me, please… You scare me…”

Nino tried to speak… to say something… but all the words had been stuck at his throat. He felt the other’s hands wrapping around him, pulling him into a hug. Nino clang on him, desperate to feel Satoshi’s warmth. He continued to cry… He wished the other didn’t see him like that… he knew that he cared for him and that was making him feel even more pain…

“I should have known that there was something going on… I could tell you were acting a bit weird… and me the idiot kept talking about stupid happy things…”

_Happy things…_ Nino’s grip on the other’s shirt tightened. They were in the middle of the street but he couldn’t care less at the moment.

“Nino… please, talk to me… What is wrong?” Satoshi grabbed his friend by his shoulders and pulled him slightly back so that he could see his face.

Nino though didn’t dare to look up and meet his friend’s eyes.

“Nino…” Satoshi grabbed Nino’s chin making him look into his eyes. “Tell me… What-” he didn’t have the chance to finish his question. He had frozen, completely lost. There were two wet lips locking over his. _Is Nino… kissing me? Why… why is he kissing me? Nino… what is going on?!_ He tried to understand but he couldn’t. Suddenly, the contact was lost. He saw the other stepping backwards almost terrified at the realization of his action.

“I…” Nino sounded panicked. What could he say? Nothing… he turned around and ran away as fast as possible. This time he felt more, heavier tears falling down his cheeks and didn’t make any effort to stop them. This time there was no one following him… no one trying to catch his arm. He accelerated his pace even more.

Only once in his apartment he had the chance to catch his breath. He leaned on the closed door letting his body fall on the ground. He took his phone out of his pocket. With trembling hands he started typing a text.

To : **Oh-chan**  
I’m sorry…

_I’m sorry for being such a shitty friend… I’m sorry for having fallen in love with you…_

***

_Twelve years ago…_

 

“Everyone, please welcome Ohno Satoshi! I expect you to be friendly with him”

Nino looked up and saw a small figured, sleepy looking boy. _Cute…_ he thought smiling without even realizing it. He saw the new student taking his seat at the desk right behind him and threw him a quick glance. Somehow, he could feel a similar aura… and he wanted to get to know him. When the bell rang, Nino didn’t lose any more time. He turned around and gave his hand to the other who seemed rather surprised by his approach.

“I’m Ninomiya Kazunari. You can call me Nino!”

It took a few seconds but in the end Satoshi smiled. “I’m Ohno Satoshi”

“Oh-chan!” Nino cut him off, not even giving the chance to speak. “It’s cute!”

“Don’t start scaring people, Nino!” a tall boy spoke close to them. Satoshi turned his head towards him and found him smiling gently at him. “I’m Matsumoto Jun. Nice to meet you!”

Satoshi smiled. “Ohno Satoshi. Nice to meet you, too!”

Jun sat at the edge of the Nino’s desk. “Don’t worry about him” he said pointing at Nino. “Deep inside he’s a good guy!”

“Oh… J actually praises me… That should be recorded!”

“Nino-chan! Jun-chan!” another tall boy appeared next to them. He wasn’t a classmate of them. “And this is…?” he asked looking at Satoshi.

“Our new classmate, Ohno Satoshi” Jun replied before Nino managed to talk again.

“But we call him Oh-chan!” Nino talked again uninvited.

“Well, nice to meet you, Oh-chan! I’m Aiba Masaki. 3C. You can call me Aiba-chan or however you want. I don’t mind!”

“You don’t mind?!” Nino asked with a smirk. “That’s great Aibaka!”

Masaki narrowed his eyes. “Nino!”

Nino shrugged his shoulders as he stood up from his desk causing Jun to muffle a laugh. “What?! It was you the one who said you didn’t mind! Besides what a better nickname than a descriptive one?!” and with that he ran away.

“If I catch you…” Masaki yelled as he ran behind him.

“You all seem to be really close…” Satoshi mumbled as he looked at the two friends who were running in the corridor.

“We’ve been stuck together since elementary school… It’s unavoidable…” Jun replied.

“Since elementary?! That must be really nice. Never had the opportunity to actually stay in the same group of friends for too long…” Satoshi said in a sad tone.

“Why?”

“My dad… He had to travel. I never spent more than a year in the same school…”

Jun looked at him frowning. “Well, this is our last year so you won’t need to follow your family everywhere!”

“That’s true… but still…” Satoshi wasn’t used to be this welcomed anywhere. He would probably be mocked for his small figure or his chubby cheeks but he chose to remain silent and only nod; it wouldn’t serve anything; it could only trigger things the wrong way and this was the last thing he wanted.

As if Jun was reading his confusion, he patted his shoulder in a friendly way. “If Nino decided to give you a nickname, it means that you deserve it… He’s too picky and has an - annoyingly sometimes - good intuition with people. I trust him! So, welcome!”

Satoshi frowned, more confused. How could the others be this open?!

He spent the breaks with the three friends since Nino had decided not to leave him alone. Before he knew it, the day had already come to its end. He was waiting for the bus when he heard a cheerful voice behind him. “Oh-chan!”

“Nino-kun…” he hadn’t seen the others since they had their club activities.

The other tilted his head. “I told you, you can call me Nino! But who would have thought that we take the same bus?! Which one is your stop?” he continued in the same excited way.

“The sixth…” Satoshi mumbled feeling shy. The other was too open, too friendly and he didn’t know how to perceive the whole thing; he wasn’t used to it.

“That’s great!”

The bus finally came and they took the two free seats at the back.

“Don’t look this puzzled! It’s just that I will finally have someone to go to school with! J and Aibaka live opposite my house… My stop is the fourth by the way!”

“Ah…” was all that Satoshi could say still trying to get accustomed to the other boy’s friendly and open attitude.

Nino flashed him a wide smile once they reached his stop. “Here I go… See you tomorrow morning, Oh-chan!” there was a quick pat on his shoulder. Satoshi found himself smile back. Perhaps this year might prove to be a good one…

***

Satoshi’s eyes bulged when he felt someone’s hand brushing his lower back. It didn’t last more than a few seconds, so he couldn’t be positive if it was done by accident or on purpose. He turned around to see and to his surprise he found a widely smiling Nino. _Did he just…?_

“Good morning, Oh-chan!”

_It must have been an accident…_ he smiled shyly. “Good morning, Nino-kun!”

“I told you to call me, Nino!” the other said in a whining tone, his cheeks forming a small pout.

Satoshi felt the touch again.

“You have a cute butt, Oh-chan!” Nino whispered in his ear once they reached school and winked at him before descending from the bus and running towards Jun and Masaki who were waiting at the gate.

Satoshi followed behind not knowing how to perceive the whole thing. Surely, he wasn’t used to having friends around him… but were friends supposed to be like that?! If he wanted to be honest, he felt a bit uncomfortable… he was not an easily, through physical expression expressive person.

Masaki waved at him vividly making him escape from his thoughts. “Good morning, Oh-chan!”

“You said it! Now, move, Aibaka… We need to go to class…” to Satoshi’s surprise he saw Nino having grabbed Masaki’s arm, half his body pressed against the other as he dragged him towards the building.

Satoshi was left to watch the whole thing speechless.

“What did he do?”

“Eh?” Satoshi turned his head surprised to see Jun standing next to him. The latter was looking at the direction of the other two.

“No- nothing!” Satoshi hurried to reply. He didn’t want them to get him wrong. For some reason, he wanted them to keep him around the way they had done the previous day.

“This guy… He’s a bit too clingy… You should be warned… From friendly or _not so_ friendly pats, to hugs when you expect them the least and…” Jun coughed a bit “… let’s say… multiple choice touching…? Something like that… He keeps it only for the special ones…”

“I see…” Satoshi replied skeptical as they entered the main building to change their shoes.

“ _Since all those Johnny idols do it publicly, why can’t I?!_ ” Jun said imitating his friend. “Don’t pay too much attention… He really doesn’t mean any harm… I guess he’s just too shy to actually say that he cares about his friends that he chooses such ridiculous methods!”

“I see…” Satoshi whispered once again still lost in his thoughts.

“Did he terrify you this much?” Jun asked between a funny and serious tone.

“I admit I didn’t expect such… an openness… but he didn’t terrify me! It’s just that I’m not used to be close with friends…” _or more correctly to have friends…_ Satoshi thought sadly.

“Oh-chan! J!” Nino called for them from the end of the corridor. “Hurry up! Asuda saw Mr. Remain-Silent climbing the stairs!”

Jun cursed and started running to the classroom, followed by Satoshi. The latter saw Nino sighing relieved when he saw them entering the room safely and smiled. It was certain that Nino didn’t behave like a usual seventeen year old guy; he still had a playfulness in him and for some reason Satoshi realized that he actually liked that. Nino had an energy he hadn’t; it was as if they were completing each other.

He sat at his desk and took out his book. Mr. Remain-Silent, as Nino had called him, had already entered and asked them to open their books. He tried to find the exercise they were asked to solve on page fourteen but he couldn’t. He had started to panic when he saw a small note thrown in front of him.

Wrong book. The yellow one, Oh-chan! XD

He laughed at his mistake. He quickly took the right book in hand and thanked in a whisper the other for saving him. As he tried to concentrate on the exercise, Jun’s words came to his mind from earlier. He looked up at the other’s back and a smile appeared on his lips. He was a bit weird; Satoshi couldn’t deny it but Nino seemed to be a genuinely good guy.

_Perhaps that’s what it means to have a friend…_

***

A couple of months passed by and Satoshi had got used to Nino’s _skinship_. He had found himself smiling genuinely, perhaps in a way too long time. Little by little, Satoshi could feel part of their small group. They would meet up to study together or simply hang out. Jun and Masaki were great but Satoshi found himself feeling more a bit more comfortable around Nino. There was something about the other that despite his high tension made him feel at ease. Masaki would repeat his questions more than necessary; Jun would focus on him… but Nino would make sure he was there for him. It wasn’t that he had said it out loud but his eyes… Satoshi knew it because of those eyes.

Perhaps they shared a similar aura, as Nino had once told him after a long session of video games at which Satoshi had failed miserably. Perhaps, it was simply that he could listen… even the words that he hadn’t chosen to speak out loud. There were times that he wasn’t feeling like going to crowded places; Nino would say that he’d prefer to watch a movie and make Jun and Masaki stay at homme. There were other times that he was sad due to his parents’ daily dose of quarrel; Nino would drag him to his home saying that he was bored and needed company. He would have made sure to have chosen his favorite Ghibli movie and his favorite tea. There were also other times that Satoshi just wanted to be on his own; Nino would only squeeze his shoulder and after giving him a reassuring, an _I’m-here-if-you-need-anything_ smile he’d say goodbye and then, later at night, would text him good night followed by a silly face.

Nino had managed to become an important person in Satoshi’s life; the friend he always wanted; the brother he didn’t have. He had come to realize that what Jun had told him that day was true… because he did feel as if he was one of Nino’s _special_ ones and couldn’t be happier about it.

***

It was a Saturday evening, a week before summer holidays. They were gathered at Masaki’s house to watch a baseball game.

They had just opened the bottle of coke when Masaki sat opposite them clapping his hands enthusiastically. “What do you say we all spend next weekend in my uncle’s onsen in Chiba? It would be so much fun! A great way to start our last summer vacations as students!”

No one needed much persuasion. In a few hours everything was settled.

It was six in the morning when they met up at the bus stop. Masaki was super excited and to Satoshi’s surprise Jun seemed rather moody.

“He’s not a morning person and having to deal with an over-excited Masaki causes _this_ …” Nino said as he sat next to him.

It was always as if he could read his mind. Satoshi smiled. “I’m so lucky to have come to this high school…” Satoshi spoke in a little, trembling voice. “I never thought that I could have found real, good friends… It almost feels like a dream…”

“And Oh-chan becomes sappy…” Nino said in his usual mischievous tone. “They do have reason when they say that you can see the real other in the morning…” and with that stood up throwing his hands in the air to stretch his back muscles. “Why should I be the only normal around you?! I’m so underestimated!”

Satoshi smiled. He knew that the other did it in order to prevent him from going all emotional… to reassure him that this is how it is supposed to do.

Two hours later they were greeted by Masaki’s uncle who seemed to have the same bright personality like his nephew. They were led to their room which was big enough for all of them and with immediate access to a private open-air pool along with a great view at the mountain.

“So beautiful!” Satoshi muttered as he let his eyes wander around.

“It is, isn’t it?!” Masaki replied in an overly excited and surely proud tone.

“I’d say we go to the village… then have lunch and after a good sleep, we can go to the onsen… It’s always better in the evening!” Jun said as he took off his things.

“No problem!” Nino shrugged his shoulders. “What about you, Oh-chan?” Satoshi nodded smiling.

Masaki grinned. “Let’s go!”

Jun and Masaki were surely taking their time to check the local shops. Satoshi on the other hand preferred to explore nature.

“Hey…” he heard Nino’s voice followed by a tight grip around his arm. He felt the other gluing on his side but didn’t mind.

“Aren’t you interested in the local fashion?” he asked in a teasing way.

“No… We have model pair for that…” Nino replied, his voice sounding almost like a whiny meow.

Satoshi smiled and let his friend do as he like. They walked towards the north where the forest began. Nino had turned completely silent as they headed to the small spring of which Masaki’s uncle had spoken. It was really beautiful, covered as it was by different wild flowers germinated between rocks.

Satoshi sat carefully on a fallen tree trunk, Nino not uttering a single word as he sat next to him. He smiled when he felt the latter resting his head on his shoulder.

“It’s weird… when you’re in the city you crave for silence and when you’re in the country you crave for noise…”

“Because the noise of nature is calming…” Nino whispered without moving away.

Satoshi smiled. “I guess we do have the same aura…”

Nino gasped surprised and as Satoshi turned his gaze to his friend, he was almost sure he could see a hint of blush on his friend’s cheeks.

“That’s why we’re best friends!” Nino said smiling widely and jumped up, going closer to the spring to clean his face with the water.

Satoshi frowned for a second but scolded himself internally. He should have already got used to the other’s sudden change of energy.

“It’s about time we go back! I can’t stand Jun’s whines when he gets hungry”

Nino burst into loud laughs and started running. “The last one will treat the other ice cream!”

Satoshi protested but started running fast. Yes… this was happiness…

~.~.~

“This feels so nice…” Masaki said as he entered the pool. “Come guys!”

Nino and Jun followed him, leaving Satoshi the last one to enter. “Oh my God, Oh-chan! Mother Nature was certainly generous with you!”

Nino tried his best to avoid looking at this ‘generous part’ Masaki was talking about but no matter how much he tried, he couldn’t. His eyes caught a glimpse of it before the other entered the water. _Mother Nature was indeed generous with him… and unfair with me…_ he thought smiling sadly. He turned the other way preferring to keep his gaze at his friends. He had never seen Satoshi naked… He could only imagine how he’d look but nothing had prepared him for reality. He was slim but there were well defined muscles to balance everything. He had a manly figure despite his short height… He was beautiful.

“I’m sure the ladies are delighted!” his friend continued on a teasing tone causing Satoshi to blush. Nino saw it... Not that he hadn’t known but it was what he needed to get completely sure that he would never become part of that scenery in Satoshi’s eyes.

Nino knew he should whistle playfully, say a smart teasing comment but what he wanted to do was to yell but he couldn’t, so he chose silence. He had realized for quite a long time now that it was the wisest thing to do. He turned the other way to look at the mountain. Satoshi was right. It was indeed relaxing. He let his hands rest on the wooden surface and leaned his head on them. He sighed deeply in an attempt to get rid of the thoughts that kept coming to his mind. He had closed his eyes when he heard the voice he wished the least to listen to at the moment.

“I prefer this view, too” Satoshi mumbled as he came next to him.

Nino cleared his throat. “It’s the most relaxing…” he whispered, afraid of how his voice would be heard. His heart was beating faster than ever and the other’s closeness wasn’t helping him much. No matter how much he tried to divert his attention, he would still throw small glances to the one next to him. He had tried to listen to his mind but his body kept moving on its own… his eyes kept moving on the other’s body as if they were trying to map every single detail, knowing that he would never get to remember it a different way. Seeing the way his cheeks looked flushed due to the hot water, his hair had got almost wet due to the steams... He could only imagine that he’d look similar when he’d share his bed with his lover only that there would be also a passion written on his face, an eagerness, a rawness he would never get to know…

Nino felt his skin burning at these thoughts. He could see the way the droplets were left on his arms, making him wish he could simply lean and lick them. He wanted to spread kisses to those full lips… to this velvet looking skin… he wanted to make the other lose his mind in his touch… to make him surrender to his caresses… to hear him call his name…

It didn’t take much time to find a specific part of his body reacting to his imagination. He knew it was about time to stop being this close to him, yet he couldn’t do it. He craved to touch the other, to feel his skin against his, to taste every single part of his body but knew he couldn’t... he’d never have the right to. He didn’t want to betray him. He was Satoshi’s friend… his best friend… he knew the other cared truthfully for him and he didn’t want to lose that… because he cared too.

“Nino, are you ok? You look… flushed…” Satoshi’s words brought Nino back to reality.

“Eh?!” he was almost panting. “Ah! Yes… Just the water… I guess it’s time for me to get out” he took the small towel in his hand and trying not to make his erection visible he escaped as if he was hunted down. He could feel Jun’s gaze on him but tried not to think much.

He entered the small shower at the corridor and let the cold water fall on his body. Finally he could feel his member soften and the tears, he had tried so hard to keep inside, fall down his face freely. Why should it be this complicated? Why couldn’t he be like his friends? Why should he suffer like this? He tried to find the right answer… any answer… but failed. It wasn’t what he had asked for in his life but then he knew that he didn’t have the choice… He was who he was and his heart had decided to fall in love with this particular person… his best friend… _But that’s how life is… never easy…_ After a while, he wrapped the towel around his naked body and got out of the shower just to bump onto Jun who was waiting for him with his hands folded in front of his chest.

“Jun!” Nino tried to sound carefree but he knew he had failed dramatically. “You want a shower too?”

“No”

Nino walked back into their room finding it empty. “Aiba? Oh-chan?”

“They went downstairs to help with dinner”

“Is that so?!” Nino replied in a rather awkward tone as he wore his yukata. Once he was ready, he went to open the door when Jun’s hand on his shoulder forbade him for making another step forwards.

“Nino… If it hurts you so much, why are you so close to him?”

Nino’s heart clenched. Jun knew… _Of course he’d know…_

“Because I’m weak… and…” he bit his lower lip hesitating for a minute. “And… because I love him too much to stay away; even if being this close, means pain…”

***

_Ten years ago…_

 

“Oh-chan?” Nino asked surprised to find Satoshi standing in front of his apartment door, soaked from the rain, holding a small suitcase in his right hand.

“May I come in?” his voice was weak, making Nino’s heart clench painfully.

“Of course…” Nino pulled him inside.

“I had nowhere to go…” Satoshi spoke in the same tone, keeping his head lowered.

“You had; you came here. But we can talk later…” he took the coat and threw it on the floor checking Satoshi’s temperature. He was cold. “You should take a hot bath… I don’t want my Oh-chan to fall ill!”

Nino was confused. He hurried in his bedroom to take a clean towel. Something big must have happened; it was clear.

“Here you are!” he said with a smile when he went back to the other. “C’mon, now! Hurry up! You already sneezed once!” he gave the usual playful smack on the other’s butt knowing it would create a more relaxed atmosphere between them.

Five minutes later, he could hear the water falling in the shower and sighed. He had already thrown the wet clothes in the laundry hamper and gone to the kitchen to prepare some hot tea. Why was Satoshi looking like this? It killed him… He only wished to see Satoshi smiling. He loved his smile… it was so beautiful, so true… what could have happened that made it impossible for him to smile? Why was there a suitcase? Had he left his parents’ house? He had left right after high school because he had decided to speak openly of his sexuality; something unacceptable for his father. He wouldn’t care less though. He was who he was but that wasn’t Satoshi’s case… So, what could have happened?

After everything was ready, he headed to his bedroom to pick up some clean clothes for the other when he heard footsteps. He looked at his side and saw Satoshi looking at him with a somewhat forced smile. _My Satoshi…_

“Oh-chan… I chose these clothes for you… I believe that-” he couldn’t finish.

He couldn’t even remember what he wanted to say when he felt Satoshi’s hands wrapping around him, holding him in a tight hug. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. This wasn’t the time to think of the other’s warmth… this was the time to be the one Satoshi needed at the moment… his friend. He turned and hugged him back, his heart beating painfully in his chest when he felt Satoshi’s hands gripping almost desperately his sweater. He could feel his sorrow and he hated it.

“They sent me away…” Satoshi muttered with a trembling, weak voice after several minutes of silence. “Because I… I didn’t want to follow my dad’s profession… because I told them I passed the exams of the National School of Fine Arts”

“Oh-chan…” Nino whispered, kissing softly Satoshi’s soft hair. “Parents don’t always understand… People… they are stubborn… ego-centric… believing they know the best and don’t care for the others’ feelings, as long as their expectations, their wishes are fulfilled…” his hands were caressing the naked back that still had some water drops.

“I don’t know what I’d do, if I didn’t have you, Nino…” Satoshi said and sobbed harder.

Nino sighed tightening his hands around him. “You are my best friend, Oh-chan… Of course, you’d have me…”

It took a while for Satoshi to calm down. Nino ordered some pizza and beers and let the other cuddle with him on the sofa. On TV there would be Satoshi’s favorite Ghibli movie; Hotaru no Haka. It wasn’t the most carefree one but since Satoshi liked it, Nino had no reason to object. Usually, he would be the one leaning on the other but today it was the opposite and Nino had to fight with himself.

It was a torture but he knew the other needed it. He had tried to focus on Satoshi’s words and not on the fact that his body was glued on his, his hot breath hitting on the crook of his neck but his body was stubborn. His breath had started being heavy, his mouth dry… he cursed when he realized a bulge was forming inside his pants. What would he say? He tried to move the other a bit and to his surprise there was no objection. Nino could only smile. Satoshi had already fallen asleep, rolled up, as he was, to himself like a ball.

Nino came closer, listening to the other’s slow breathing… he looked like an angel… he _was_ an angel… Nino kneeled next to him, his eyes moving from the long eyelashes that covered beautifully his eyes, to the slightly due to the heat flushed chubby cheeks… and then to his mouth with those pouty lips being was half-opened. Without even realizing what he was doing, he let his hand caress feather-like that beautiful face that kept haunting him; from each eye to that nose and then to cheeks moving lower to the jaw line. It felt so soft under his touch… so perfect.

He could see the stains of dry tears and he wished they were never there… Satoshi should never cry… He leaned closer… his heart was beating crazily against his ribs… he was biting his lower lip, trying to reason himself… but he knew it was above his power. He closed his eyes and let his lips touch the ones he was dreaming of. They tasted sweet… yet bitter… because they would never kiss him back… they weren’t his and never would be…

He fell on the floor, feeling his eyes watering… He had just stolen a kiss from Satoshi… a kiss he craved for and knew he had no right of… Satoshi moved a bit in his sleep, making Nino gasp. What had he just done?! He ran to his bathroom and looked at himself in the mirror.

“How can you dare to call yourself his friend?! He came to you for comfort and all you do is… such low, selfish things…” he hit the basin with force feeling hot tears falling down his cheeks. “You are the worst friend, Ninomiya Kazunari… the worst…”

~.~.~

Nino frowned when he woke up with a smell of freshly toasted bread and coffee. He opened his eyes and walked slowly to the kitchen surprised to see Satoshi having prepared breakfast. On the table he could see butter, marmalade, honey...

“Ah! Good morning, Nino!” Satoshi said with a smile that told Nino the other was feeling better.

“Oh-chan…” Nino walked closer and let his hand give his usual little smack on Satoshi’s butt. “Is that how you try to wheedle the ladies? With western-style breakfast?” he asked winking at his friend playfully.

“Brat!” Satoshi said trying to muffle a laugh as he sat on the table. “Shut up and sit down!”

Nino laughed but he had seen it… that faint blush on Satoshi’s cheeks. He took a deep breath in an attempt not to show the nervousness that was building up inside him. They ate breakfast in silence and it was only when they brought the empty plates to the sink that Nino spoke.

“You can stay here for as long as you want…”

“As… roommates?! You mean it?” Satoshi asked, hope being reflected on his eyes.

Nino smiled nodding. “Yes… as roommates and yes… I mean it!”

Satoshi hugged him tightly. “I love you, Nino! You really are the best friend I could have!”

Nino smiled bitterly as he brought hesitantly his hands on the other hugging him back. “I love you, too…” the words came out as a whisper and wasn’t sure if the other had heard him or not.

Satoshi broke the hug and pushed Nino back on his seat. “I will do the dishes! We’re roommates, right?”

Nino couldn’t help but smile. It was this Satoshi that he wanted to see… this smile… this glow… and if could be of any help, he had sworn he’d be by his side… always…

“Great! Since you like doing the dishes, I’ll leave this task on you! And the laundry by the way… I wouldn’t say no!”

“Only if you do the cleaning and be in charge of the garbage!” Satoshi replied and laughed loud when he saw Nino’s pouting face. “It was you who started it! The only right thing to do is to divide them…”

“Sneaky Oh-chan!”

“Learnt from the best!” Satoshi winked at him and Nino laughed. It was these moments that made the latter say that being Satoshi’s friend was really worth it.

~.~.~

Two days later the bed they had ordered had arrived and placed in the room next to Nino’s one, inaugurating that way officially their cohabitation. That night they had ordered sushi to celebrate along with Jun and Masaki. The first was still living with his parents while being in a search of a small apartment and the latter had already moved in with his girlfriend. They were together only nine months and everyone thought it was too fast but Nino knew that Masaki’s deepest wish was to have a family. In a way he could understand him… what could be better than coming home, knowing that you will spend time with your precious one?!

“I’m sure you’ll have lots of fun!” Masaki said happily as he finished his second beer.

Nino only smiled, his gaze avoiding Jun. He could feel that the latter was staring at him all the time. He knew Jun; he knew that his friend most probably disapproved of his decision but he would never go back.

He had just thrown the garbage in the bin outside the house when he heard footsteps behind him. “And I was wondering if you’d come!” he tried to sound not nervous.

Jun came closer. “You know this is not a good idea, Nino…”

“He needs me…” Nino replied and ran up the stairs not giving the other the chance to say anything else. Yes… perhaps it was not a good idea for him. He knew that living together with the one he was madly in love for two years would put him in challenging situations, but for Satoshi surely was. That wide, genuine smile of his proved it…

He entered the apartment smiling fondly when he heard Satoshi’s laugh echoing in his ears. Yes, it was… Because he was his _friend_ … and above all he cared…

 

 

 

 


	2. Tomodachi (One-Shot)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nino met Ohno Satoshi twelve years ago when the latter transferred to his class. From the moment he met him he felt that they shared a similar aura. Little by little, they came closer. Before he knew it, Nino had already fallen in love with him. There was only one problem... Ohno Satoshi was his best friend...

Title: Tomodachi (One-Shot)

Author: Andy-chan (antimiya88)

Pairings: Ohmiya (main & one-sided?), Sakumiya (side), Ohno x Ishihara Satomi, Aiba x OC, Jun x OC

Genre: romance, angst, slice of life

Rating: R

Summary: Nino met Ohno Satoshi twelve years ago when the latter transferred to his class. From the moment he met him he felt that they shared a similar aura. Little by little, they came closer. Before he knew it, Nino had already fallen in love with him. There was only one problem... Ohno Satoshi was his best friend...

Disclaimer: Kazu belongs to his Oh-chan and Oh-chan belongs to his Kazu

 

 

 

 

 

 

_Nine years ago…_  
  
  
“I can’t believe they let us leave two hours earlier!” Nino exclaimed happily as he left the storage he was working at part-time. He was waiting to walk across the street when he saw a curry restaurant at the corner of the road. A smile appeared on his face.  
  
 _He’ll surely like it!_ he thought as he looked at the bag he was carrying with his right hand. _But I must hurry or it will turn cold!_  
  
It had been one year since Satoshi had moved in with him. Jun would always find the opportunity to tell him that it was the wrong thing to do and that he should reconsider and move out but Nino wouldn’t listen to him. Surely it was tough sometimes… like when Satoshi would come into the kitchen wearing nothing but his boxers to grab his morning coffee or when he’d grip his hand tightly whenever they’d watch a horror movie but Nino had to admit that he loved being with him. Living with Satoshi had revealed other sides of him… sides that had made Nino fall deeper in love with him, if that was possible. Like those times he had fallen ill. Seeing him getting completely panicked and calling the doctor even when it was a cold, made Nino feel loved… perhaps not in the way he’d wish but still it made him feel warm inside.  
  
He placed the key in the lock, humming his favorite song. He could smell the hot curry and even if he wasn’t the biggest fan of it, he could already imagine how Satoshi’s face would glow in happiness and that was more than enough. To his surprise, he found another pair of shoes as he entered… a pair of sneakers; clearly a considerably smaller size than Jun’s or Masaki’s ones. He walked into the living room but it was empty… only the TV was still on, most probably forgotten.  
  
With every step forward, he felt his heart pounding painfully. It couldn’t be… right? He left the food in the kitchen and walked as soundlessly as possible towards the bedrooms. He froze. That was undoubtedly a moan… not one of pain… but one of pleasure. He knew he should leave but his legs continued on walking on their own stopping only when he reached the door that wasn’t closed firmly. And he saw him… them… The way that he moaned her name while he was moving inside of her… moving his hips in slow but powerful thrusts while his mouth was occupied with one of her breasts… the way he was finding his pleasure in her body… the way her fingers were buried in his back leaving marks… while her feet were pushing him to go deeper… while she was screaming his first name…  
  
His mind had stopped working, his eyes stuck on the couple of the bed that was now moving faster, more desperately… lost in one another. No… He couldn’t watch anymore… he ran away as soundlessly as possible stumbling on his feet, falling on the floor. But no… he had no right to disturb this moment of theirs… He passed by the kitchen when he caught with the corner of his eye the bag with the two curry plates. He knew he couldn’t escape. Satoshi would have known he had come back home at some point. He was his friend, wasn’t he? With a trembling hand, he picked up a post-it.  
  
Hey Lover boy!  
I thought you’d need some energy boost!   
See you in the morning! Have lots of fun! ;)  
  
He read the note twice. It sounded… playful and supportive… exactly like it should be. He placed it on the bag hurriedly and grabbed his keys, getting out of the apartment. He climbed down the stairs almost falling on the last one, his whole body shaking. It wasn’t that he hadn’t thought of it… He had… many times… but he preferred to hope falsely that he would never actually have to face the reality. He shook his head trying to get rid of the painful images he had just witnessed but no matter how much he tried, he couldn’t.  
  
He needed desperately to forget. He took the metro, getting out at Shinjuku. He entered the first club he saw and went straight to the bar ordering a drink. It didn’t take much time to be hit on by several guys. Others would call him cute… others pretty… and he could only smirk, his heart clenching and unclenching painfully. It was so ironic… so many wanting him when he only wanted one… one that he would never have. He drank his fifth one-shot in one go, not even feeling it burning his throat. His eyesight had already turned blurry. He went to the dancefloor. His hips were moving fast to the rhythm. With the alcohol in his veins it almost felt as if he could forget…  
  
“Hey you…” a low, deep voice reached his ears from behind.  
  
Nino smirked when he saw two hands holding him by the waist. He turned around and to his surprise the one hugging him could be described as fairly… handsome; no… if he was honest enough with himself he should admit that that he was rather… hot. He was the exact opposite from Satoshi but that was probably for the best. He had something very manly on him… he was taller with nice sculpted muscles, as Nino could see from the tight shirt he was wearing.  
  
“Hey you, too…” Nino replied huskily. It felt so nice to be held like this… to feel someone’s body this close to his.  
  
“I’m Sho…” the other whispered in his ear and Nino moaned when he felt the tip of Sho’s tongue teasing his earlobe.  
  
“Nino…”  
  
“Nice to meet you, Nino…” the other repeated in a suggestive way, rotating his hips slowly that sent chills down Nino’s spine.  
  
They danced having their bodies glued against each other… Song after song, Nino could feel himself relaxing, giving in more to the other’s ministrations. His body was reacting, feeling the sweet fog of desire covering him. Images of Satoshi’s naked body kept flashing in his mind… making him want to feel the same… feel desired… feel satisfied… even if it was with someone else. Without thinking about it twice, he crushed his lips against Sho’s smiling relieved when he felt the other responding to him almost greedily. Soon, they moved to the toilets without even stopping in between. Nino was thrown against the narrow door of the cubicle they had entered. Feeling the other’s hot tongue tasting his neck was enough to make him bring his hands into his hair and move his hips, giving him the message to continue.  
  
Sho was surely a skilled lover… he had already made him cum only by toying him… or was it because he couldn’t even think having sex when the only one he wanted was Satoshi?! Perhaps that was the reason… perhaps it was both… He didn’t care… He simply wanted to do it… to forget… about him… her… about everything…  
  
“Fuck me, Sho…” the words came out from his mouth without even realizing them.  
  
The other looked at him for a few seconds as if he was trying to read him. “Are you sure you want this with _me_?”  
  
Nino smiled bitterly. “Yes… because _he_ will never want to do it…”  
  
“Taken?” Sho asked as he attached his mouth on the exposed skin right under Nino’s collarbones.  
  
“No… friend…” Nino replied with difficulty and jumped up in the air wrapping his legs around Sho’s waist. “Now, please… hurry up! I want you!”  
  
The other didn’t need to listen twice. Nino screamed as his prostate was hit dead on. His nails burying into Sho’s arms. Tears filled his eyes as he remembered how _her_ nails were buried into _his_ skin.  
  
“Stop thinking…” Sho mumbled as he kissed the tears away.  
  
Nino looked deep into his eyes, focusing in them till he felt his body shaking as the orgasm tore him. Sho threw the used condom in the toilet and flushed it before helping Nino get dressed.  
  
“Are you ok?”  
  
Nino frowned detecting a trace of concern in the other’s voice.  
  
“Yes… don’t worry…”  
  
Sho smiled as he brushed his hand through Nino’s hair. “I’m glad…” he dragged the latter back to the bar where he made a nod to the bartender. A pen was given to him. “Here’s my number” he muttered as he wrote it on Nino’s hand. “If you ever feel lonely, give me a call! Bye!” and with that he winked at him and left.  
  
Nino looked at the number for a second and ran back to the basins to clean it off but then… those disturbing images came back to his mind. Perhaps… perhaps it wasn’t such a bad idea to keep it…  
  
Forty minutes later he was knocking on Jun’s door. It was almost midnight but couldn’t go back home tonight. He saw his friend opening the door in his pajamas, wearing glasses and his hair rather messy. He knew Jun was ready to curse but didn’t. He also knew the other would understand... he always did. He could feel his lower lip trembling and he was sure tears had made their appearance. Jun sighed deeply before pulling him inside. Nino had expected him to yell, to tell him that he was right but to his surprise Jun remained silent. He only hugged him tightly.  
  
That was all Nino needed. Feeling all the power he had leaving him, he buried in his friend’s hug letting his sobs free, his whole body jerking.  
  
“It’s ok… it’s ok…” Jun whispered in his ear trying to calm him down. “I’m right here…”  
  
~.~.~  
  
“Nino!”  
  
“Good morning, lover boy!” Nino winked at Satoshi as he let his keys on the small table next to the entrance. He saw the other blushing madly and tilted his head. “Don’t tell me that you will go all shy now!”  
  
“But you… you… you heard…” Satoshi said lowering his head.  
  
“It wasn’t my fault that you were loud…” Nino shrugged his shoulders. “Who would have thought that you who speak this calm and soft could be this… expressive in bed?! I guess Aiba-chan would be disappointed knowing that he has a serious contestant!”  
  
“Stop mocking me!” Satoshi replied with an even deeper blush as he hit softly Nino’s head.  
  
“It’s not my fault, Oh-chan!” Nino said in his usual mischievous tone, his hand giving the usual smack on the other’s butt. “You know that I find you cute when you act all shy!”  
  
“You’ll never change!” Satoshi said trying to hold his laughter.  
  
“No!” Nino said as he tilted his head. “But that’s why we’re friends, aren’t we?”  
  
Satoshi sighed. “Yes, we are!”  
  
***  
  
 _Four years ago…_  
  
  
Nino was checking his tie on the mirror near the entrance when he heard Satoshi’s voice from behind.  
  
“You look really good, Nino! Don’t worry about looking ridiculous, because you don’t!”  
  
Nino smiled as he nodded. The other could read him so well. “You know that I don’t get dressed in such clothes… I feel so… not me…”  
  
“You look fine! Now, let’s go. Aiba-chan’s floor is the third?”  
  
“Yes!”  
  
They entered in the elevator saying nothing. They rang the bell and immediately a smiling-from-ear-to-ear Masaki appeared in front of them.  
  
“Nino-chan! Oh-chan! Welcome! Did you come together?”  
  
Nino smacked playfully his friend’s forehead. “He lives the opposite way of my apartment how would we come together? We just met at the entrance!”  
  
“Sorry for asking stupid questions…” Masaki pouted before his smile came back. “I guess I am too nervous…”  
  
“It was you who decided to propose to her on Christmas Eve which also happens to be your birthday and in front of all your friends…”  
  
“I know but I still feel nervous!”  
  
Satoshi muffled a laugh. “You two are impossible! C’mon! Let’s go greet Yuko-san!”  
  
Nino sighed but followed Satoshi. He saw Masaki’s girlfriend wearing a black dress that reached her knees and her hair being beautifully arranged in a bun. She had a faint blush on her cheeks and Nino knew she was already aware of Masaki’s plans.  
  
As expected, she started crying when she saw Masaki falling on his knee while holding the ring. Cheers echoed in the room and wishes to the newly engaged couple.  
  
Nino had himself tears in his eyes; though he couldn’t be completely sure if they were there because he was happy for Masaki and Yuko or because he was sad for himself… He knew that he would never be able to do something like that… not with whom he wished.  
  
He was holding a glass of wine looking blankly on the wooden floor when suddenly, he felt a feather-like touch on his left shoulder.  
  
“Ninomiya-san, am I right?”  
  
Nino frowned. Next to him there was a young woman; an attractive and certainly flirtatious young woman. He could never deal well with such occasions. “Yes… You… can call me Nino though. That’s how everyone calls me…” he added rather nervously and sipped some of the wine.  
  
“You look cute!” the young woman said muffling a giggling laugh. “I am Takahisa Narumiko. All my friends though call me Miko!”  
  
Nino nodded politely when he caught a glimpse of a short but certainly beautiful girl smiling shyly to Satoshi. Nino could see that Satoshi was flirting back. His whole body language was showing it clearly. Suddenly he felt a knot on his throat.  
  
“Her name’s Ishihara Satomi. Yuko’s cousin from the side of her mother. She’s really beautiful and I must admit that she’s a good girl…” Nino turned his gaze to Miko who was smiling rather sadly at him. “It seems like your friend was the lucky one to have her…”  
  
Nino frowned trying to understand what the other was implying. His eyes bulged. “Ah! No! No! It isn’t like that!”  
  
“But you looked as if you were jealous…”  
  
“It’s just that our Nino is a bit too possessive with everyone, even with his friends. You don’t want to know how he has been sulking since Aiba-chan announced that he’s getting engaged!”  
  
Jun came out of nowhere and Nino sighed relieved. He would always bring him out of any difficult situation. He wanted him to be around but when Sakura demanded her boyfriend back, Nino knew Jun had no choice but to follow her. He found it amusing how such a hypothetical DoS would turn into a complete DoM when it came to her. But then, wasn’t he one?! Perhaps it was love the one at fault…  
  
“Nino-san being like that…” Miko said after a long pause of silence as she reluctantly came closer to Nino. “That’s so cute!”  
  
Nino could only shrug his shoulders and drink some more. Satoshi across the room was leaning closer, whispering something funny if he judged by the way the girl was trying to hold her laugh back.  
  
“I guess it’s my charm!” he winked at Miko trying to distract himself and it was working till he was left with no wine. “Wait here… I need to refill!”  
  
“Of course!” she beamed a wide smile and Nino smiled back. If he wasn’t gay, he was sure he’d go for her. She was shy but bold in the same time… she was… cute…  
  
He went to the table where all the bottles were in line and chose the red wine he had been drinking. He ticked his tongue annoyed when he realized it was empty. The other choice would be white that he really didn’t like and scotch… _What the hell will I do?_  
  
“Hey, Nino!” Satoshi stood next to him sounding excited. “You are not going to believe it!”  
  
“You met this beautiful girl, Satomi her name, who you really like and found out that you share many things in common, including the sense of humor!”  
  
“H- how did you-?”  
  
Nino smirked placing his hand on Satoshi’s shoulder before leaning close to him to whisper in his ear. “You are far too obvious, my dear friend!” a playful smack landed on Satoshi’s butt.  
  
“I don’t know though… she’s too beautiful and I’m not…”  
  
“You’re not…?”  
  
“Handsome like Aiba-chan or Jun-kun… I’m not cute like you… How could she really like some-”  
  
“You might not have the typical, ikemen in terms of idol rules, beauty but you are fooling yourself if you believe that you’re not attractive! Your eyes might not be the biggest ones but their shape is unique, the expressions someone can see in them are enough to make them want to fall in the abyss called your soul… you always say that you don’t like your cheeks but I find them adorable. They make you look cute like a kid… they give you a youthfulness that makes you irresistible… especially when you pout… and your lips curve into one of the most beautiful smiles I have ever seen… your-” Nino gasped. What was he doing?! He cleared his throat getting his composure back. A small smirk appeared at the edge of his lips as he turned back to Satoshi who was staring at him astonished. “I… hope you got the boost you needed… now go to her and flirt some more… And don’t worry…” he whispered back in his ear. “Once you have her in the bed, she won’t leave… I have been a witness of how well you know the manual, remember?!”  
  
“Nino…” Satoshi said embarrassed but also happy. “I had never expected you thought so high of me…”  
  
“Stupid…” Nino said sounding him now embarrassed. “Go! She’s already looking over here!”  
  
Satoshi squeezed Nino’s shoulder and mumbled a thank you before going back to her. Nino turned and looked at them. He had met Satoshi’s girlfriends in the past but something this time made it more painful than usual… perhaps because he sensed that this was something to stay. He turned and looked at Miko who was still waiting for him. Even if he did go back, what would he gain?! Nothing… he’d only falsely raise her hopes to crash them down later. No… He wasn’t a scum…  
  
He went to the inner room to find his coat and avoiding everyone, he left. Once the cold weather hit his face, he felt better. It wasn’t that he wasn’t happy for his friends but a small part of him felt jealous. Everyone had found their special someone while he had none. For around an hour he wandered around the streets looking at the Christmas themed decorations of the shop windows, letting his mind go for a while… he needed those moments of having to think of absolutely nothing.  
  
He had sat on a bench close to Ebisu garden having a beer on his hand when he decided it was about time to face reality. He pulled out his phone. There were several missed calls from Jun, Masaki and Satoshi. He quickly typed a message sending it to the one he knew he’d understand him.  
  
To: **Jun**  
I couldn’t stay longer and didn’t want  
to make you worry… Say that I had enough  
of alcohol and I’m really sorry to Aiba-chan and  
Yuko-san! Ok?  
  
He was ready to put it back in his pocket when he decided to try his luck. It wasn’t the first time that he’d look completely desperate.  
  
To: **Sho**  
Hey… Would I be too desperate if I   
asked your company tonight?  
  
To his surprise the reply came in seconds, making Nino laugh. Perhaps he wasn’t the only desperate here and somehow that felt soothing.  
  
From: **Sho**  
Hey… No… You would be Santa bringing  
me one hell of a present!  
  
  
He raised his hand to the first taxi he saw coming and gave the other’s address. It had been years since they started meeting. Nino didn’t feel anything for Sho, most likely like the latter didn’t feel anything for him. They would only meet and have sex. At first, Nino had felt guilty… guilty of betraying _him_ and the love he had for _him_. But soon, he realized that his body had needs… needs that as much as he tried to suppress and ignore were still there. It was something purely physical… a way to stop feeling empty when things were unbearable.  
  
The cases he had screamed Satoshi’s name when he came shudderingly weren’t few. He knew it wasn’t the classiest thing to do when it was someone else doing the job but Sho had never said anything; neither seemed he bothered by it. He had never asked him, like Nino had never asked Sho. They weren’t friends… they were just two men who met and had sex... Simple as that.  
  
He got off the taxi and knocked on the door.  
  
“ _Who is it?_ ”  
  
“Santa!” Nino replied in a playful way.  
  
The door opened revealing Sho wearing only a pair of jeans.  
  
“Wow! That’s fast!” Nino said as he was pulled inside. Seconds later he found himself thrown on the other’s double bed. A moan escaped from his throat when he felt a hot mouth sucking hungrily his neck. “More…” he said huskily as he felt the other’s weight on him. Yes… that was exactly what he needed that night… to forget…  
  
~.~.~  
  
“I still don’t understand why he should have left without saying anything…” Satoshi repeated sighing.  
  
“You know how Nino is! He never wants others to worry for him!” Jun said patting Satoshi’s back. “Especially such a night!”  
  
“But… what if he needed help?! Since he didn’t feel well…”  
  
“He texted me saying that he was already in a taxi going home! Don’t worry! He’s fine!”  
  
Satoshi nodded but was still skeptical. Why would Nino text Jun and not him? Wasn’t he supposed to be his best friend? Sometimes he felt as if he couldn’t understand him… as if there was a side of his unreachable to him…  
  
“I’m sure he chose me because he knows I’m the coolest of all… and he didn’t want to spoil your time with her…” Jun said as if he could read his mind. “Nino thinks a bit too much!”  
  
Satoshi sighed. _Nino…_  
  
***  
  
 _Two years ago…_  
  
  
“You will live together?” Nino asked sulking.  
  
Satoshi sighed. “Yes, Nino! I do think it’s about time… Masaki and Yuko are already expecting their first child, Jun and Sakura got married two months ago… I want to settle down too!”  
  
“I am surrounded by people who want to get old so soon…” Nino said in a dramatic tone that made Satoshi sigh. “I can’t believe you all decided to settle down when you’re only in your 20s! People are supposed to have fun till they reach at least thirty! It’s the rule of nature!”  
  
“No… I’d say it’s more the rule of Nino! You surely look as if you are enjoying your single life!”  
  
“Of course I do!”  
  
“I still find it weird though…” Satoshi mumbled as he drank some of his tea.  
  
“You find weird what?”  
  
“That you are a player… I always thought you’d be the guy for a relationship…” Satoshi could swear that for a second Nino’s eyes darkened.  
  
“Are you kidding me?! Relationships will only age you… Don’t you see how Aiba-chan got those traces of wrinkles at his eyes? No, thank you! I’m still 27! Life is to enjoy!”  
  
“I’m sure he does enjoy it!”  
  
“While he hears high pitched cries in the middle of the night or while he has sex, killing the mood?!”  
  
“Nino!” Satoshi tried to hold his laughs. “Anyway… I didn’t say I will get married… Just that we will live together… I don’t like living alone…”  
  
“It was you who left my apartment though…” Nino replied sounding grumpy.  
  
“You kept embarrassing me every time I brought a girl, Nino!”  
  
Nino smirked wickedly as he leaned closer. “It’s not my fault that you looked so cute when I was teasing you… It was yours!”  
  
“And yet you never did so!”  
  
Nino tilted his head confused. “Never did what?”  
  
“Bring someone back to the apartment!”  
  
Nino smiled bitterly. “I guess no one was worth it…”  
  
“See?! I knew you were the romantic type… You’re just in denial because you haven’t found the one…”  
  
Nino gulped. “Maybe…”  
  
“Trust me! You will know when you will!” Satoshi said smiling widely. “Though to be honest I really thought that Miko-san could be that one… She had insisted for months!”  
  
Nino moved on his seat, looking clearly nervous. “She had… I admit she was a cute girl but it wasn’t there… the flame…”  
  
“I guess you’re right…” Satoshi spoke while giving an understanding nod. “But when you do find the one I want to be the first one to know, ok?”  
  
Nino smirked. “Of course you’d be the first to know! As if I’d lose that face of surprise of yours for anything in this world!”  
  
***  
  
 _One year ago…_  
  
  
“Are you sure you don’t want to come?” Masaki asked with a pout.  
  
“With all of you drooling over your women?! I think I’ll pass!” Nino said as he lied on the sofa.  
  
“But you can bring yours, too!”  
  
Nino looked at his friend with his eyebrow raised. “The last one I fucked - I don’t remember her name - was surely sexy but I’m sure her vocabulary is limited to ‘faster’ and ‘like this’! So, bring her for what reason?!”  
  
Masaki pouted even more. “But it’d be so much fun! All of us in the onsen as couples, now!”  
  
“I will still cheer up for you!”  
  
Jun cleared his throat. “I’m sure Nino will think about it!”  
  
Nino knew that everyone was staring at him. “Fine! I will think about it!” He caught the small smile on Satoshi’s smile and felt guilty because he had _nothing_ to think about.  
  
***  
  
“It’s him…”  
  
Nino looked up and saw Sho sitting back on the bed holding two cups of coffee. Nino turned his eyes back on the phone. Satoshi had sent him a photo of the three couples having that small spring on their backs saying that they were all missing him.  
  
“Yes… They are in an onsen, Chiba… We had been there almost ten years ago…”  
  
“Ah… Here’s your coffee!”  
  
“Thanks…” Nino mumbled as he placed his phone back on the bedside table. “Sho, can I ask you something, if I’m not too discreet?”  
  
“Sure!”  
  
“Why do you keep meeting with me?”  
  
“Because I’m not stupid to miss hot sex?!”  
  
Nino laughed. “No… what I meant is why you choose to have meaningless sex? Haven’t you found someone?” He could feel the other stiffening.  
  
“Let’s say that we are in a similar case…”  
  
Nino looked at the other whose face had turned gloomy. “Friend?”  
  
Sho smiled bitterly. “No… taken…”  
  
“Sorry…” Nino whispered not knowing what else to say.  
  
“We’re pathetic, aren’t we?!”  
  
Nino chose not to confirm it. Perhaps they were but it wasn’t their fault. “No… we’re just in love…”  
  
***  
  
 _Present day…_  
  
  
“ _NINO! NINO! Open the door!_ ”  
  
Nino had closed his ears wanting not to hear the loud bangs on his door. He was still dressed in his clothes. He hadn’t moved from the floor. It had been a while since he had no more tears to shed but he felt too numb to move.  
  
The bangs though continued.  
  
“ _If you don’t open, I swear I’ll break it!_ ”  
  
He had never heard Satoshi like that in the twelve years he knew him. He was afraid… afraid that he’d hate him… afraid that he’d reject him as a friend… afraid he’d disappear from his life.  
  
“ _Kazu…_ ” this time the voice sounded desperate… worried…  
  
Nino gasped. He had dreamt of hearing the other calling him like that countless times and yet now that he had, it felt like a sting to his heart.  
  
“ _Please, open the door… I need to talk to you… please…_ ”  
  
He couldn’t stand it anymore. With trembling hands he turned the lock and opened the door before going to the sofa, not wanting to meet the other’s gaze. He heard the door closing and footsteps coming closer to him.  
  
“Nino…” Satoshi kneeled in front of him, trying to meet Nino’s lowered gaze. “Please, look at me…” his voice didn’t betray any sign of anger and Nino decided to look at him with difficulty. “Talk to me…”  
  
“I…” Nino whispered with trembling voice “I am sorry…”  
  
“Nino…”  
  
Nino brushed the tears that were running down his cheeks with the back of his hand. “I am really sorry…”  
  
“Nino… please… tell me what is going on…”  
  
Nino shook his head fast. “I… can’t… I can’t… you’ll hate me!”  
  
“Why would I hate you?!”  
  
“Because I’ve been lying to you! I’ve been lying to you for twelve years!” Nino said louder and fell backwards. “I’m not the friend you always thought I were!”  
  
“Nino… what are you talking about?”  
  
Nino let out a loud laugh that hid pain… lots of pain. “I… I can’t… you’ll be disgusted! I… please… don’t…”  
  
“There’s no way I’d feel disgusted!”  
  
“Really…?! What if you knew that your supposedly best friend would get a hard on whenever he thought of you? What if you knew that your supposedly best friend had stolen your kiss when you had come to him for comfort? What if you knew that your supposedly best friend, had sneaked many times secretly in your bedroom while you were sleeping just to feel your warmth by his side? What if you knew that your supposedly best friend, was dying from jealousy every time he saw you kissing with a girlfriend, envying her because he wanted to be the one kissing you? What if you knew that your supposedly best friend, wanted to scream at you that he had already found the one but this one would never be his? What if you knew that your supposedly best friend is screaming your name every time he gets fucked by another man? What if you knew that your best friend is helplessly in love with you? TELL ME!”  
  
Satoshi was left speechless.  
  
Nino smirked bitterly when minutes passed by and no word came out of the other’s mouth. “See? I knew it… You _are_ disgusted…” he stood up and headed towards his door to open it. “I don’t want to bring you in a difficult position, Oh-chan… I mean… Ohno-kun… please… you may go… I understand…”  
  
To his surprise a grip on his wrist forbade him from making another step.  
  
“You… you are gay?”  
  
Nino sighed. “Yes…”  
  
“And you are in love with me… for…?” Satoshi continued in the same still shocked but certainly not hostile tone.  
  
“Twelve years…” Nino whispered defeated. “I’m really sor-” he didn’t have the chance to finish his words.  
  
“How much have I made you suffer?” Satoshi’s question made Nino gasp. He looked at the other whose eyes were glittering from tears.  
  
“You don-”  
  
“A lot… You had heard me having… sex… when you had bought us curry… That’s why you left…” Nino lowered his head. “And me the stupid… I’ve been blind… There was always this small voice in my mind, telling me that I was missing something… I knew that I was missing something, I just couldn’t imagine that it was me the one to-”  
  
“I…”  
  
“All these years… Nino…” Satoshi hugged Nino tightly. “I’m so sorry…”  
  
“You’re not disgusted with me?” Nino asked dumbfounded. He expected the other to call him disgusting, untrustworthy… to ask him never to be close to him again… not to say that he’s sorry… certainly not to hold him in his arms as he did at the moment.  
  
“Why do you insist that I’d be disgusted with you?” Satoshi’s voice was also trembling.  
  
“For having touching you…? For dirtying you in my mind…? For-”  
  
“Your heart is pure, Nino… I know it is…”  
  
“Oh-chan… but-”  
  
“I would never be disgusted with you …”  
  
“So… hmm… could that mean that… perhaps you’d… me…?” Nino felt Satoshi breaking the hug and looking directly into his eyes.  
  
“You know that I love you very much, Nino… You are my best friend…” Satoshi’s voice was weak but Nino knew he meant every single word… exactly how he meant that he’d never be able to return his feelings.  
  
“I knew that I had no chance with you, Oh-chan… I… lack some basic parts…” he tried to sound playful but knew he failed dramatically.  
  
“I always thought that we are completing each other… I…”  
  
“Don’t worry, Oh-chan. I know it. We can’t choose our sexuality. You’re straight. I’m gay…” Despite his efforts, more tears ran down his cheeks as he whispered the last words.  
  
“Nino… I am sorry… I’m really sorry…” Satoshi replied with difficulty not being able to watch his precious friend being in so much pain.  
  
Nino broke down completely. “Stupid me…” but he no matter how much he tried his body kept jerking from the cries. He was pulled into a hug.  
  
“A part of me wished I was…” Satoshi whispered in Nino’s ear as he caressed his back in an attempt to calm him down. “I’m sorry…”  
  
Nino kept crying letting the tears wet Satoshi’s shirt. It wasn’t that he was surprised yet hearing the rejection loud and clear from the other’s lips was somehow unbearable.  
  
“Oh-chan…” he whispered once he had calmed down. “I’m really happy for you and Satomi-chan… I mean it… She’s the best for you!” he knew his voice trembled a bit but tried his best not to break into sobs again. “I’m such a nuisance though… putting you through that emotional roller coaster when you should be all happy and excited to propose…”  
  
“I just want us to be ok… however you want that ok to be… if you need space, time… I just don’t want to lose you… You’re a precious person to me, Nino”  
  
“You won’t… I promise… But you should really go now… You have to create the most romantic night!”  
  
“You’ll be fine?”  
  
Nino sighed as he pushed the other from the door. “I will be…”  
  
Satoshi nodded and left. Nino closed the door letting his head lean against it. He wasn’t fine but he would be… He could still have him in his life…  
  
It was already dark outside. He was sitting on his sofa hanging his knees in a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt falling loosely on his thin figure. He tried to focus on the fact that Satoshi had accepted him… all of him… without questions or awkwardness. It was then that he thought of him. He picked up the phone and dialed the number.  
  
“ _What a surprise?! Since when do we call each other?!_ ”  
  
“You should tell him…”  
  
“ _What?_ ”  
  
“The one you love… you should tell him… even if he rejects you, you should tell him…”  
  
“ _You did?_ ”  
  
“Yes. I was rejected – obviously – but he decided not to let me out of his life… I feel terribly but also as if a burden has been lifted up from my shoulders. So, go to him and tell him how you feel!”  
  
“ _You think so…?_ ”  
  
“Yes, Sho”  
  
He ended the call and sighed. He went to the kitchen to prepare himself a tea. He didn’t want to think that Satoshi would have already placed the ring in her finger, making love to her.  
  
Twenty minutes later, he heard someone ringing his bell. _Who could that be?_ He opened it, surprised to find Sho.  
  
“May I come in?”  
  
“Sure…” he let the other enter getting more surprised when he saw that underneath the coat he was wearing a pair of black sweatpants with their matching jacket on top. “I could handle it tonight…”  
  
Sho looked at him rather perplexed for a second before he nodded in realization. “I didn’t come here for that, Nino…”  
  
“Oh… Then, what…?”  
  
It was obvious that the other was nervous.  
  
“You told me I should confess to the one I love even though I’d be rejected…”  
  
“Yes…” Nino whispered still trying to understand what the other was trying to tell him.  
  
“That’s what I came to do…”  
  
Nin frowned before he gasped, making a few steps backwards.  
  
“I am in love with you, Ninomiya Kazunari. For nine whole years… Since I saw you coming to the shop I was working at the time. You had come with him, Ohno Satoshi, to buy the second console for PlayStation. Something in your laugh caught my attention. I was sure you were a couple but when I heard him, I realized that you weren’t… I had tasted in the past what a crush over a straight guy could mean but you seemed deeply in love. And then I accidentally saw you in the club… I figured out that something must have happened… Before I knew it, I had already approached you… The rest… well… you know…”  
  
“You… you mean you kept having sex with me… hearing me calling out his name when you…” Nino felt he’d fall.  
  
“If it was the only way I could be with you, then yes… It was hurting me but you’d still come to me… You proved in a way that you needed me…”  
  
Nino looked at the other closely. Seeing the eyes of his having turned red, telling him that he did love him. His hand reached for the other’s cheek that felt hot under his touch. “You make me feel safe…” he whispered without even realizing. “I do need you, Sho…”  
  
“Nino…?”  
  
Nino took the latter’s hand leading him to his bedroom without saying anything.  
  
“Nino, are you sure? You… you have told me that you don’t like to bring someone in your bedroom…”  
  
“Hmm… I have but only the ones who are not worth it…” he sat on the bed looking at the other. “I would like to try for someone like you, Sho…”  
  
“Nino… you… mean it?” the other’s voice cracked.  
  
Nino smiled feeling his eyes getting teary as he nodded. “Yes…” he took Sho’s hand bringing him closer. “Make love to me…”  
  
“Nino…”  
  
“Kazu…” Nino whispered as he brought their lips closer. “Call me, Kazu…”  
  
***  
  
  
 _Wedding day…_  
  
  
“I knew you’d be nervous but to actually spill water on your suit?! That surely surpassed my expectations!”  
  
Satoshi’s eyes bulged. Almost trembling, he turned around and saw Nino leaning on the door with his hands folded in front of his chest.  
  
“Nino?”  
  
Nino sighed as he came closer. “You really are useless! I wonder what you would do without me!”  
  
“Nino… you… you really came!”  
  
Nino winked at him. “As if I could lose the chance to see Oh-chan forgetting his vows in front of everyone…”  
  
“You disappeared these past few months…”  
  
“I did… but I needed it… I had to clear things up… but don’t worry I’ve come back as good as new and with much greater force!” he winked at him and let his hand touch the other’s butt. “How I’ve missed this cute butt of yours, Oh-chan!”  
  
They both laughed but stopped when they heard someone clearing his throat. “Jeez, Sho-chan! I didn’t do anything! Just a friendly gesture!”  
  
Satoshi nodded at the other. “Nice to meet you”  
  
“I’m Sakurai Sho, nice to meet you too!”  
  
“Didn’t I get myself one hot boyfriend?”  
  
Satoshi smiled widely. “You did!” Nino’s face had glowed from happiness as he had spoken. He was sure that his friend had found the one.  
  
Soon, Jun and Masaki appeared to tell Satoshi that it was about time to go, surprised to find Sho in there. Nino explained who he was blushing and got a few cheering whistles and teasing comments. He couldn’t be happier that all his friends had accepted him. Masaki had even proposed that once Satoshi and Satomi were back from their honeymoon they could all go together to the onsen as couples, making Jun give him a smack on the head as he pulled him out of the room telling him that they were already late.  
  
Nino was also about to follow them when Satoshi grabbed him by his shoulder to whisper in his ear. “I am glad you kept your promise and let me be the first to know that you found your special one!”  
  
Nino looked at his friend and smiled. “I always keep my promises!”  
  
Satoshi hurried to leave as Jun’s voice was sounding angrier and angrier.  
  
Sho caressed Nino’s cheek before he pecked his lips. “You know that I love you!”  
  
Smiling, Nino turned around and hugged his boyfriend. “I do! I love you too, Sho-chan!”  
  
“Hurry up, Nino! We will be late! You decided to come so you better come because being the groom’s best man isn’t only a case to make him feel embarrassed as you’ve probably planned but also do some tasks!” Jun yelled from outside causing Nino to laugh out loud.  
  
“You really are happy!” Sho whispered in his ear, before placing a feather-like kiss on his cheek.  
  
“I am. I have you…” Nino whispered. “I have them…”  
  
“You have him…” Sho added as he wrapped his hands around Nino’s slim waist. There was no trace of jealousy.  
  
Nino smiled because Sho knew him well.  
  
“Yes… He’s my best friend…” he replied and surprisingly there was anything missing anymore. Perhaps because that was the place that Satoshi fitted the best in his life… like his best friend…  
  
  
  
  
  
THE END

 

 

 

 

 

A.N. Sooo minna this is the first time I tried something like that! ^_^ I know it's a bit depressing - I cried myself for the first time as I was writing it - but I wanted to be realistic. I don't think that someone can turn gay simply like that. Ohno proved how much he loved Nino by keeping him by his side and mostly by feeling guilty for all the  sadness he had caused to him, even if it was unvoluntarily. I believe that in its own way it does have a happy ending!!! Ohmiya still have each other and Nino realized that there was someone else by his side all these years that could be his special one! I admit I am a bit nervous posting this since it's a kind of story I don't think I've written so far... ><  
My dear Dani ([](http://dani-mathoz.livejournal.com/profile)[ **dani_mathoz**](http://dani-mathoz.livejournal.com/) ) I hope it turned out as you had thought of it!

I really hope you enjoyed it and as always your comments are <333!!!

 

See you very soon,  
Andy ^_^

 

 

 

*Chapter 11 of "Crosslinked Chaos" will be posted this Sunday! ;)

 

 

 

 

 


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